June 20, 2005

Hello
I just got back from the Jr. Nationals. What a weekend. I ended up staying at the Embassy Suites with my friend Malea Jensen. She was competing in the LHW category. This was the most impressive set of athletes on stage. It was an interesting show....they were definatley penalizing for TOO MUCH hardness. It just seems they don't know exactly what direction to take the sport. It also becomes a situation with WHO shows up at that particular venue. If you have BIG girls you have to judge the BIG girls. If you have ripped GIRLS.......you have to judge ripped girls. That is why.... you have to just be YOU. I think there is no other answer. Compete because you LOVE the journey to the stage. If it takes away from your LIFE... it is time to re-evaluate. You should not let the 16 weeks prior to a contest CONTROL you every decision. You have to balance it into you LIFE or it will take its toll. You have to make the diet manageable...not intolerable. You have to be able to function at WORK and not justify being late, calling in sick, or just making mistakes justified becuase you are preparing for a show.

I have made all these selfish mistakes preparing for my bodybuilding shows. I have alignated myself from family, friends, loved ones, boyfriends, etc............It isn't right. You also shouldn't use a preparing for a BB show to escape from YOURSELF and taking a good look at who you are. It is easy to get caught up in the whole rituatlistic experience of preparing for a show. You have to get up at a certain time, eat at certain times, drink a certain amount of water, train at a specific time, etc..........you become a completly justified neurotic. I hate to see my friends slip into that behavior. I know....I have been there. I turned myself into a robot. I became emotionless..... I didn't even feel anymore.

This past show... my grandmother died. I was so into my contest preparation that I don't even think I could digest what was happening. It was all about me... what I needed to eat, drink, train, etc......The idea of having to fly home and interupt my schedule frustrated me. Meanwhile...my grandmother was dying. You really have to keep things into perspective. For those that are competing this year... please do not neglect what is important in your life for the sake of winning. At the end of the day... it is better to enjoy the journey to the stage then the stage itself. There is only 1 winner.....and it might not be you. What if you sacrificed true happiness for that one day.... would it all be worth it.... even if you DO WIN.

I love BB. I love the life-style and pushing myself to be better. Winning is improving. Every year I see different developments on my body. This is the first summer that I am actually wearing shorts. I finally feel at peace with my legs. Sure, they need to be bigger.... but, I am okay with them. I don't have to hide behind a pair of long pants anymore. I am okay with where they are at.

At the end of the day we all need to seek balance. In the bodybuilding world we are all extremist.... we become obsessed with the way we eat, train, sleep, travel etc........If a little is good .... a lot must be better. We do this with training, protein intake, water intake, types of foods we think make us grow................ when is enough .. enough? Those that learn moderation last the longest in this sport.

On that note... I am back to work. I am the chief dietitian at NY diagnostic here in New York City. I see HIV/AIDS patients along with diabetes and weight loss. It is a great job and I enjoy being back in my field. I still travel on the weekends to shows and I now am doing hair and make-up for the girls. I love making people look amazing. It is so rewarding.

Right now... I want to enjoy being there for the women. I want to give back by helping to make them feel beautiful on stage.

I am not sure when I am going to compete again... maybe I will get another guest invite to the ARNOLD CLASSIC....that would be fantastic.

Only time will tell.

Colette